Rose Bonesteel

I was not reared in the Gospel and by the time I was sixteen years old, I actually thought, ‘What is there to live for or die for?’

I tried the so-called pleasures of the world, because they were the only things I knew, but many times on the dance floor I would think, ‘Is this all there is to life?’

The Lord saw my heart and a lady invited me to church. She worked in the school cafeteria where I worked. She told me about Jesus and I went to church with her. As the minister was preaching, it seemed that he pinned me right down. I had thought I was a good person because I had not been as bad as some others. One of the songs that we sung that day included the words “He lives within my heart.” After I heard the songs, the testimonies, and the sermon, I realized Jesus did not live in my heart. What was I to do about it, though? I did not know. I tried to pray at the altar, but I was not in the habit of praying. The only prayer I knew was the Lord’s Prayer. I didn’t feel that God had heard me, yet I felt that I had done something right.

When I got home, my dad met me at the door. He was an ex-boxer, and he knocked me clear across the room, leaving a hand mark on my face. The next day, he didn’t let me go to school because of the mark on my face. His blow didn’t knock the love of Jesus out of me. I wanted to know more about Jesus. The church people gave me a Bible and told me that I should read it and pray at home, so I determined to try that.

From that time on, God talked to my heart. I went back to church, and again I went forward to the altar. Once more, when I came home, my dad was at me. He took my Bible from me that night and beat me severely. Still, something in my heart said, “You had better pray.” I answered back, “But I can’t pray.” I was afraid my dad would get me again, so I waited until everything was quiet. Then I got down on my knees beside my bed and buried my face as far as I could in the mattress. I asked the Lord to make me like those people down at the church. I didn’t know how else to pray, but the Lord heard that simple prayer. He made a real change in my heart, and for the first time in my life, I felt real joy down inside.

There was a light in my window as I prayed, though the window was just plastic over an opening in the log cabin. Immediately the devil said, “That light in your window was just the moon.” I said, “No, it wasn’t the moon.” I went outside and it was so dark that you couldn’t see your hand in front of your face.

The Lord has been wonderfully good to me through the years since then. Once, after being quite ill, I was left with an awful cough, which was taking my strength. The night we had the ordinance of the Lord’s Supper in our church, I knelt by a chair and a little boy, about three years old, came and sat down beside me. He said, “I had a cough like that, but Jesus healed me and it is gone.” That is all he said to me, and then he left.

I prayed and prayed and the Lord did help me, but the following Sunday night the cough was doubly worse. I purposed in my heart to go to the altar and pray about it. As I was talking to the Lord, I felt a little tap on my shoulder. I looked up, expecting to see a grown-up, but there was this same little child. He said to me, “I had that kind of cough and the Lord healed me.” In my heart, it came to me, “Have faith as a little child.” I prayed and the Lord really healed me that night.

The Lord has been so real and precious to me. My greatest desire is to serve Him for the rest of my days. I do owe everything to Jesus. He fully satisfies my every need.