God Put the
Pieces Together

My life was shattered, but God came to the rescue.

By Alberda Northup

Sitting on a cliff, I looked up to Heaven and poured out my heart to God. “God, I love my husband, but I don’t like what is happening to our marriage.” I felt so helpless. The devil whispered to me, “Fall off this cliff into the water.” I was so ignorant I did not know that if I were to fall into that water, I would be falling into Hell because I had sin in my life.

I had been raised in a home filled with hatred, sorrow, and unrest. It was a very ungodly home, and it left terrible scars on my life. I cannot remember any peace or happiness there. My dad was a drunkard, and that caused fights between my parents. It seems that was all I knew during my childhood. I have a brother and sisters, and we would try to comfort each other. We had laughter then, but there was fear in our home of what would happen when Dad came home drunk.

As a child, I was sent to a church where I learned that there was a Heaven and a Hell. I knew at a very early age that I did not want to live with the devil, but I did not know how to make Heaven my home. We had many crucifixes and pictures of Jesus on the cross in our house, and I remember looking at them and wondering why Jesus was on the cross. At church, I watched the priest do certain religious rituals and questioned this also. No one at home could explain these things to me. I do not ever remember being told that I needed salvation—that I needed to ask Jesus to come into my heart.

The only prayer I knew

When I went into junior high school, I would get off the bus in the morning and walk a few blocks to a little church that was always open. There I would pray the only prayer I knew: “God, please help me to be a good girl.” Then I would go to school and try to be a good girl, because I knew I would not go to Heaven if I did things that were wrong.

At the age of fifteen, I met a man in the Navy who was stationed near our home. I knew the very night I met Darry that he would become my husband. I was seventeen when we ran away and were married in the state of Nevada. I had a lot of turmoil inside because of my home life, but I thought all that would be over once I had a home of my own. I was seeking something, but I did not really know what I wanted. There was emptiness in my heart and life.

Darry was discharged from the Navy after we married, so we moved to the city of Port Angeles, Washington, where he had been raised. Our first child came along, and I thought Darry and I were a happy couple. But sin was in our lives, and it brought sorrow into our home.

Five years into our marriage, shortly after our second child was born, we became unhappy and restless in our life together. We were renting a run-down house, and we did not have much. Our children slept on mattresses on the floor. There was drinking and partying in our home, and my heart was heavy. I realized I needed God, but I did not know how to reach Him.

I cried out for help

These circumstances led to the Sunday afternoon out on the cliff when I cried out to God. I had put our children down for a nap, and Darry was sleeping on the sofa. I went for a walk and sat on that cliff, overlooking the water that surrounds the city of Port Angeles. My heart was broken. Tears poured down my face as I looked up to God and said, “God, I love my husband. I don’t want our home to be broken, but I really don’t know what more to do.” I begged Him to save our marriage and help us. It seemed that was all I could tell God at that time. I did not know how to pray for salvation because I did not know about salvation; I just cried out to God for help. I was sitting close to the edge of that cliff, and I thought that if I fell into the water, nobody would miss me. The Lord was faithful, though, and He heard my cries. He saw that my heart wanted to serve Him, and He helped me to stand up and walk back to the house.

A short time later, we left Port Angeles and moved to the town of Clallam Bay. Darry had injured himself on the job, so we were without work. For a while, our home was a little motel room. Even after Darry returned to work, we had next to nothing to call our own. But God was working in our lives. I remember taking our little boy to a local Sunday school, where he learned the song, “Jesus Loves Me.” I would have him sing it for his daddy, not knowing that the words of the song were bringing conviction on my husband’s heart.

Darry came home a new man

One day, while visiting Port Angeles, Darry stopped at his dad’s house and asked for prayer. I did not know this at the time. Darry had never mentioned to me that he came from a religious family, and I knew nothing about the Apostolic Faith Church. Then Darry was invited to revival meetings in Neah Bay, Washington, and he went with his dad one evening. I did not want to go, so I stayed home with the children. That night Darry came home a different man. He told me, “Berda, I’m saved.” I thought, What does that mean? I did not know that Jesus would save me from sin, but God knew my heart and that, deep inside, I was longing for Him.

On another evening, my husband’s father stopped by and again invited us to church. I had no excuses that night, so I went. The building was small, and the crowd was large. I do not remember what was preached or the songs that were sung, but I remember that everything seemed strange to me. I had never been in a Gospel meeting. An invitation to pray was given at the end of the service, and everyone went forward to the altars in the front. I did not understand what that was all about, and I became frightened and ran out the door to the parking lot.

As I stood by our car and looked up at the stars that were so bright, I told the Lord, “I don’t understand any of this. I don’t understand what they are doing or telling me, but I know I want to make Heaven my home. Please help me.” As the tears ran down my face, the Lord was helping me, although I did not realize it then.

I poured out my heart to the Lord

The next day, while Darry was at work and the children napped, I knelt by my bed in that motel room. There I poured out my heart to the Lord. I said, “Jesus, I don’t understand, but they say You must come into my heart in order for me to make Heaven. Would You please do that?” That is what He did. There has not been a day since then that I have regretted that prayer.

From that moment on, everything was different in my life. Jesus put peace in my heart, and I was happy at last. I loved to sing songs that I learned at church. The song I enjoyed most was, “In the Garden.” It said that Jesus walked with me and talked with me, and that thought was so special! I wanted to tell everyone about this wonderful salvation, and I wanted everyone to have what I had received. Little by little, I began to understand what the cross was all about—I knew that Jesus had died to take my sins away, and that His love kept Him on the cross for me.

God worked in our lives

It wasn’t long before Darry and I could clearly see the hand of the Lord working in our behalf. We moved back into Port Angeles, where we were able to be in all the church services. We attended our first Apostolic Faith camp meeting in Portland, Oregon, that summer. There I learned about sanctification. I wanted to make Heaven, so I decided that if this experience was necessary, then I wanted it. When we went home, I told the Lord, “I know I need to be sanctified. Would you sanctify me?” That is what He did.

In September of that year, we had special meetings in Port Angeles, and I heard that I needed the baptism of the Holy Spirit. I sought the Lord, and one Sunday morning as I was seeking the Holy Spirit, I felt the blessing and believed it was the Spirit of God. At that point, I did not hear anyone else praying. I heard only the angels singing, and the Lord filled me with the Holy Spirit. It was such a wonderful experience.

Jesus is my closest Friend

Today, I do not look back longingly at my old life. There is nothing there that I want. I have a Friend who is closer than any other, and not once has this Friend failed me. Not once has He deserted me when I have needed Him. When I have leaned on Him, He has been there with His strong arms to uphold me. There have been difficult places in my life, even since I gave my heart to God, but He has always been there to see me through.

I know that if it were not for God, Darry and I would not be married today. I am so thankful for the miracle that He did for us. One day I want to kneel at Jesus’ feet and thank Him for the many blessings and benefits He has given me.

Alberda Northup lives with her
husband in Port Angeles, Washington